We understand that Burning Man is going to be a bit of a culture shock for you.  There are only a hundred vintages on our wine list, turn-down caviar has been replaced with Belgian chocolate to reduce spoilage, we won’t have tanning beds to add that extra glow, and there are no paparazzi to tip off when you need a quick fix of publicity.  To help you cope with this shocking environment, we are compiling a few Frequently Asked Questions.  If we have not already addressed your deepest hopes and fears, please have your personal assistant add a comment here and we will address it as quickly as possible.

• “What’s with the apology posted on the Burning Man site?  We are rich, we don’t apologize! Will camping with an apologist impact my experience?”
• “It seems Caravancicle broke several of the ‘Ten Principles’.  Will “Chateau Tananburn” address those issues?”
• “Decommodification?  Isn’t that Commie bullshit?”
• “Drugs?  It’s cool, right?”
• “What inspired you to build Château Tananburn?”
• “What is MOOP? Is it easy to score?”
• “Do you accept Bitcoin?”
• “What are these Ten Principles?”
• “Can I reserve a suite at Château Tananburn now, but hold off payment until I have secured tickets for myself and my entourage?”
• “What is a Sherpa?”
• “Wristbands, really?  Don’t you think that is a little bridge & tunnel?”